Since you read this blog to share in our cancer journey (rather than my parenting!) I will start in order of priority for you. Even though, thankfully, I am much more attune to the latter than the former.
Cancer is now our normal and as my chemo schedule changes to every other week I am finding a rhythm that makes this normal more manageable. My body is able to recover between infusions and my platelets, white bloods cells and neutrophils are able to bounce back without the shots that have us playing the schedule guessing game related to when we will have chemo (or not). So I am thankful for this new schedule and more predictable blood work. And, in today’s pre-chemo blood work, Dr. Osborne was excited to report that my tumor markers in the liver are stable or declining. And, my completely inflated and off-balance boob is back to ‘normal’ … This is all super encouraging news that the chemo is working! It’s taking a hit on some other things (potassium, iron, magnesium and today my blood pressure was 165/40😁) so we are managing side effects while thankful for medicine and doctors that the Lord uses to sustain my life as long as He ordains.
And in an effort to prepare my heart for the expected likely abrupt end (prognosis is average of 26 months from stage 4 diagnosis – December 2014 for us) of my earthly life, I have been studying Heaven with a few dozen women this summer. If you are in Dallas and want to join me, come on! It’s super fun and encouraging for this life and the next! My friend Kay and I alternate leading and we meet for 7 weeks at Northwest Bible from 930-11 on Tu. you are all welcome – unless you’re a man:) Can email my friend Eraina at firstname.lastname@example.org for the book info and electronic copy of the study guide.
And, on the family front, some girlfriends and I took our kiddos to my friend Lezleys’ parent’s lake house last week. Linc loves having his friends and swimming all day and snacking on Cheetos puffs (see below) and I like my friends and being at the pool all day too (minus the puffs!) so it’s a win win.
However, some times I get really mean and demand that he eat protein or can’t have candy for breakfast or help clean up. And his response to one of these was a very loud announcement that ‘you are not even the best mom in the whole world…’ Really?! I think I know that but thanks for reminding me with your grateful heart. And if that wasn’t insulting enough for a 4 year old he followed that by saying, ‘even though you think you are!’ What?!?! Look, little man and ‘threenager’ (who needs to get the memo that he’s 4 since I’ve heard it’s better and need him to play along!), I may be foolishly arrogant about some things but it ain’t my parenting. I replied with all the sincerity I have to say ‘you’re right, I am not the best mom in the whole wide world.’ And tried not to die laughing.
So, little man, when and if you ever read this, I hope it makes you laugh too. And I hope you have learned to accept the Lords sovereignty to give you ‘not even the best mom in the whole world.’ But for my many failings I can assure you that I love you and adore you and delight in you. Even when it’s not always mutual.
And while I wrap up in the chemo chair, he is with his Aunt CC and a friend Amanda who asked me if she could take him to ‘Build a Bear’ and make a bear with recordings of messages from me embedded in his little friend. How precious is that? And this …?
It’s good to be loved. At 4 and at 43! Thanks for loving our family, friends.