Yet another negative. Make that a triple.

Well friends. Never a dull moment. The pathology for biopsy results of left breast is in … And never saw this one coming … Triple negative. So I have an entirely separate primary cancer – how exactly does one get cancer twice?! Triple negative is the least ‘desirable’ (as if any are ‘desirable’…) and most aggressive. Clearly mine (right side) is already very aggressive but, by definition, ‘triple negative’ means that it is ‘negative’ for the 3 attributes they test. And they use those attributes (for each that are ‘positive’ like I am ‘hormone positive’…) to decide the course of action. Therefore triple negative confounds doctors bc they don’t know how to defend against it. We are in shock. This never even crossed our mind as a possibility.

I didn’t sleep well last night and Lord prompted maybe I should consider going back to Houston for his opinion on next steps – and that was BEFORE we got this curveball. And in fact that’s what I was texting w Dr O about when she mentioned there will be limitations of trials available since I have both kinds of breast cancer (hormone positive and, now, triple negative). I had reached out to Christina but never heard back yesterday. And now I think I know why. 

Sweet to get a ‘hug’ from the Lord through my friend Suzanne who, having no idea about our early morning news, sent this verse.

Amen and amen. Or, in my case, ‘The news may be bad and the new cancer may be even meaner but even then my faithful love for you will remain. The covenant of blessing will never be broken,’ says the Lord who has mercy on you…

Indeed, sweet mercy. New every morning. Great is His faithfulness.


27 thoughts on “Yet another negative. Make that a triple.

  1. Love you, Jen! Thanks for keeping your eyes (and by extension and the wonders of the internet, my eyes) focused securely on our Help! The ripples of this journey, even in troubled waters, reach farther than you can know!

    In my family’s suffering (husband still without a job), I am comforted by your testimony in your suffering! I am reminded that “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.” I see a hint of that glory in you today! An earthly shadow, reflecting your Heavenly Father!

    Prayers and hugs,
    Karin Fary Carpenter

  2. Oh, Jen, how do you endure? It seems the waves continue to sweep over all those in the Clouse House. But of course, you make it clear on you’re able to carry on. It’s by God’s strength, His guidance, His peace and comfort that you persevere. In one of our recent conversations, you encouraged me to spend time in James so I’ll be praying much of that over you and your family today. Sending big hugs. Love you.

  3. Jennifer my friend who I will meet One Day. Can I be heartbroken and grateful for you at the same time? Thank God for using you to remind us (me) that His love and mercy endures. Forever and Ever. No matter what.

  4. Jen, though I have never met you, I feel I know you. I subscribe to your blog so I may learn from you. You have taught me so much about grace and faith and trust and total commitment to the Lord. I love how you face this disease full head on without faltering. “My way” would be to stick my head in the sand and pray, pray, pray it would just go away. Proclaiming it by mouth is so daunting to me as it makes it real. IT IS REAL and you have taught me that proclaiming it does not make you weaker, yet stronger. Thank you.

  5. Jen, we have never met but someday I look forward to sitting with you and enjoying a good laugh. Jesus borough us together so you could teach me and help me in my faith journey. We are studying Revelations in my bible study and one of the first weeks was spent discussing prophets. One can easily dismiss modern day prophets as nonexistent, but then I read your words or listen to your heaven 101 and think she’s been sent to teach us. I pray for you and your sweet family but I know you are all going to be better than fine. Keep writing. You have so much to share. Blessings

  6. While this latest news is hard…..I have seen God’s hand in all your care so I am waiting to see what HE has planned now. Isn’t a period…just a comma in your life.
    Praying faithfully and claiming His promises for each of you!!!!!

  7. Always positive, always whatever the Lord has planned for you, always with a smile on your face, always enjoying being with your family and friends and the love and faith you have with. Christ.
    You are the most remarkable person I
    Know. God bless you and so many prayers are being said for. You Over and over and might add tears

  8. Jen,
    Reading your updates this week while our family is on Spring Break in Costa Rica. I’ve been re-reading God’s Smuggler, and these excerpts made me think of you.

    “Pray for the courage to do all we can, and then having done all, to stand.”
    (Mr. Whetstra’s direction to young Andrew on how to pray (as the Germans prepared their conquest of Holland.)

    Your love has given me (us) great joy and encouragement, because you, brother (sister), have (are) refreshed (refreshing) the hearts of the Lord’s people. — Philemon 1:7

    In the years of living this life of faith, I have never known God’s care to fail.
    — Brother Andrew

    Getting ready to listen to Scott’s and your “Heaven” talk while my family heads to the beach. (-: (Staying in to give my white-as-a-ghost skin a break from the scorching sun. (-:)

    With love, prayers and much respect & admiration for you and the God we serve,

    Betsy Borrego & family

  9. Jen. I’m so sorry. I’m listening to your “Heaven 101” talk. Hearing Scott tell your story and your sweet accent in talking about heaven, just makes this news harder for me to know you now have a second cancer. Sweet friend. I love you, but I know not near as much as God does. I admire your trust in Him, but also your honesty. Thank you for being such an example for me. You continue to be a mentor for me. Just love you. Praying for y’all.

    Amy Massinger

  10. I am so sorry. Praying with you. Suzanne sent me that verse & pic, as well. Such a timely reminder. You are loved, my friend. Praying for wisdom and sweet abiding in this.

  11. Shocked; brought to my knees – dismayed but not doubting that the Lord is aware of the next news and the next step and all the impacts of those things. The Lord hears all of our voices lifting you up. Your wonderful faith is a miracle. 2 Cor. 4:7-9 But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.

  12. I’m sorry to hear this news…Praying this verse for you. May you be comforted as you comfort SO many of us who love you!
    ❀️ You, friend!
    God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort.He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.
    2 Corinthians 1:3-4

  13. Wow. I kind of felt like screaming, but then I saw the verse, prayed the verse, and accepted your news. God is good and He is great! Sending love your way!

  14. He is with you through every test, every treatment, every result, but I don’t have to tell you that, as you continue to share that with us and thank you for that. You are the person that has the most true faith I have ever seen. You do just what he wants of us, sharing his word and showing his love and grace. I love you and keep praying every day. Like the song “He’s Got The Whole World in His Hands”. He’s got you in his hands, loving hands to comfort you.

  15. Jen, I started following your journey and praying for your family after reading Mel’s book. Your college days, friendship and sisterhood resonated with my soul. May the peace of the Lord be with your and your people surrounding you with love and comfort on a daily basis. Grace and peace to you and your family.

  16. ❀ Much love to you, Jen. So thankful for your faith, many, many times my faith has been bolstered through your writings. What a faith legacy you have trailing behind you πŸ™‚ Your servanthood will be rewarded my friend! Can't wait to meet you on the other side!

  17. Oh Jenn! I don’t even know what to say.. But I’m Praying for you….peace, energy, and healing!! I read this in my devotion today and it reminded me of you.. You are such an amazing testimony to trusting in the Lord … Great is they faithfulness.. He loves you so much!
    “Daily streams”
    Keep your eye steadily fixed on the infinite grandeur of Christ’s finished work and righteousness. Look to Jesus and believe, look to Jesus and live! Nay, more; as you look to him, hoist your sails and buffet manfully the sea of life.
    Love and prayers,

  18. Heartfelt love is coming to you. I loved your class on Heaven. Profound!!!!! Know you are an inspiration to all of us. I pray to have your strength, fortitude and unfailing faith. Your attitude is a treasure to all. I love you sweetest Jen!! Mary Cray-Huntington Sent from my iPhone


  19. OMG – all I can think is REALLY?! I mean really?! Oh how I wish those of us that love you could take this all from you. Sending you a big gentle bear hug and more prayers than you can imagine.

  20. Oh, Jen, I HATE hearing this news. But, as a dear friend just reminded me and my husband today, no matter how bad the news seems to US, God is always, ALWAYS working for our good, even when things look very bad. I know you know that, but it helped me to hear it today. Praying for you and Scott – for wisdom and discernment, strength and courage, anointing and favor. He IS good, and He IS faithful, and He has all of you in His grip.

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